an odd boy : you can't accidentally drink reindeer urine

you can't accidentally

The odd boy lay down by the football field – took out a slim volume of Mallarmé, / The centre-forward called him an imbecile – it’s an odd boy who doesn’t like sport. / Sport, Sport, masculine sport – equips a young man for society, Yes, sport turns out a jolly good sort – it’s an odd boy who doesn’t like sport.
Vivian Stanshall—Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band—Sport (the odd boy)—Keynsham—1969

My father would have concurred with Vivian Stanshall – but missed the irony. I came to realise, as I grew older, that my father always missed irony – and that his humour was mainly of the slipping-on-a-banana-skin schadenfreude variety. He enjoyed ‘Benny Hill’ – and was irritated by ‘The Goon Show.’

In later life I gained access to my medical records. They were of no interest apart from the one remark made by a Doctor Page in 1957. The remark read: ‘an odd boy ’ – and so I was.

No treatment was suggested – and no comments were made as to whether I had recovered from the malady. I was 5 years old when I was described as ‘an odd boy’ – and at the age of 12 my male classmates started noticing the fact. They noticed that I didn’t enjoy competitive sport – and it eventually roused their ire. I’d been injudiciously open about the fact that I found the whole ‘team’ business distinctly loathsome.

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Volume 1 of an odd boy by Doc Togden will be published by Aro Books worldwide in 2011

Excerpts can be read on Doc Togden's Facebook fanpage